Analytic Vision

Posts Tagged ‘business’

The Timeline

Posted by Ştefan Alexandrescu on 13/10/2017



« [The Romanian] is wasteful with time, more so than people from the West. Time is anything for the Romanian but a currency. At the fair, he haggles for hours for whatnots. The same goes for parties, he loses days and nights»; «It is said that [the Romanian] is undisciplined working in the economic field. When at the same time people from the West keep a regular rhythm, like clockwork, the Romanian people knows disorderly work, more like play.The Romanian does not work methodically, but in leaps; he has long periods of rest, and if needed he will work double tides and do slave work »

Constantin Rădulescu Motru (1998)



The history of the concept

The concept of the timeline was introduced even since Ancient Greece, and William James, one of the parents of modern psychology, has affirmed over a century ago that our perceptions of the events of our lives span over « a string of time ». Therefore, for thousands of years, it has been acknowledged that people had an own representation of time, in themselves. In other words, each person has its own way of representing, storing, and keeping time in their own body.

It was said, at the beginnings of developing the timeline, that, in general, Europeans tend to represent their timeline as passing through them, facing the future, living in the present and with the past behind them. This is classical In Time position.

Americans, on the other hand, represent the timeline in front of them, with the past on the left, the present in front of them and the future on the right. It is the classical Meta Time (Through Time) position.

This generalization was later retracted because people can have very different perceptions in different contexts (e.g. In Time relaxing during the weekend, but “very” Meta Time during business hours). All of the other positions derive from these two basic ones, with little variation. According to the way someone perceives it, the timeline it is split into two big categories: In Time and Meta Time.

Some specialists also consider Between Time and/or Across Time, arguing that they cannot be classified as subtypes of one of the above.

Before anything else, it is important to keep in mind that there are no “In Time people” and “Meta Time people”, even though these attitudes are easier to approach concerning an (apparently) dichotomous meta type. The timeline offers important clues as to how a client will think and react in the context for which the timeline was elicited. Throughout one’s life, this perception may change in relation to a lot of factors. People often present both characteristics in different contexts.



The perception of time in different cultures

For example, in Spain, Italy, Portugal, there is a predominantly In Time perception. There is, in extremes, that ”dolce far niente”, that can be found in Romanians as well. Romanians have a strong inclination towards In Time, even when it comes to projects. Planning is not one of our strong suits, as a people. All this considered, a very interesting phenomenon is happening in Romania right now, from a generational change standpoint. Muşătoiu (2006) shows, in an article that was awarded in the science and technology section of the Young Journalist of 2007 contest, organized by Freedom House and Edipresse AS, how the psychology of the personality is being influenced by technology in Romania and labels the Y generation as multitasking and technological par excellence.

People with a Meta Time perspective are by excellence business people. There is no way that a business freelancer will ever accomplish anything if he or she does not have a Meta Time perspective.

You will rarely find people in leadership positions with an In Time perspective, and they will not remain there for long. Any job that requires that ability to work with more than one schedule, to plan and do more than one thing at a time demands a Meta Time perspective.

Japan, USA, Germany, China offer examples of Meta Time cultures. It is the subjective opinion of the author of this article that it is highly likely that in certain countries before they went under American economic influence, there was a clear and dominant In Time perception 60-90 years ago. With the loans from the American funds, the population started not only to change their mentality towards a new value system, but also their perception of time, from In Time to Meta Time.

By Philmore1q2w3e4r (Own work) [CC BY-SA 3.0 (], via Wikimedia Commons

Example of complex representation of a timelime by Philmore1q2w3e4r (Own work) [CC BY-SA 3.0 (], via Wikimedia Commons


NLP and the certification system for the timeline

The timeline, though a self-standing domain, as an accredited form of psychotherapy, has been getting an extraordinary contribution from NLP through research, books, training and presentations for decades now. The timeline is a certification field recognized by the American Board of Psychotherapists. For this one needs forming and licensing, just like any other therapy field. Those that have this accreditation have the right to work as timeline psychotherapists if they have a previous qualification as a psychotherapist, or as HR consultants in organizations.

Some specialists prefer to take a certification offer that includes both neuro linguistic programming and timeline. Training lasts in total, an approximated cumulated 2 weeks and it includes 3 separate levels, after which the trainee gets the right to practice on an international level, and it is also recognized by the American Board of Psychotherapists.

This is a method to deepen the applicative field and in which the student needs to master the qualifications (s)he needs to train in light of his/her professional development:

• interpreting the personality according to the way the timeline is visualized;

• modifying the perception of the timeline;

• therapeutic interventions to resolve past trauma;

• planning the personal and professional future using the timeline;

• professional career counseling;

• personal and professional development and management;

• improvement of communication and planning skills.

Definitely useful for a career counselor.




Rădulescu Motru, Constantin (1998). Psihologia poporului român şi alte studii de psihologie socială, Bucureşti, Paideia, pages 24-25, acquired from at 9.09.2017;

James, William (1890). Principles of Psychology: Volume I, Holt, New York, New York, USA, apud Howard, C. (2003) The NLP & Leadership Master Practitioner Audiotraining (Audio set), Manhattan Beach, California, USA;

Mitrică, Mihai; Nicolae, Crenguţa (26 iunie 2007) Încă un premiu, Business Magazin, acquired from at 9.09.2017;

Muşătoiu, Mihai (27 iunie 2006) Generaţia Multitasking, Business Magazin, acquired from at 9.09.2017;

Translation of the article ”Linia timpului” originally published in Romanian by Ștefan Alexandrescu at the 6th of August 2012 on Discerne. Translated by Ștefan Constantin Bădrăgan, 2017. Originally written in 2007. Updated by Ștefan Alexandrescu at 9.09.2017


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10 Useful Skills That Will Make You A Better Entrepreneur

Posted by Ştefan Alexandrescu on 31/07/2017


Working as a consultant for entrepreneurs is exciting and stressful in the same time. I know, because I’ve done it for years. So I decided to share some of my observations that might come as very useful for entrepreneurs and not only.

Not having these skills will not ruin you, but it would certainly slow you down. This is not an exhaustive list, just a “top of my mind” approach that I think would be very precious especially for those in the beginning of the road that make the leap from freelancing to entrepreneurship.

  1. Creating rules based on your principles. Any company is similar to the entrepreneur which creates it. In the beginning, especially if you don’t have a lot of employees, it will be easy to express how other people should behave, act or think concerning your business in order to respect what you want to create. Principles are like a lighthouse in the dark and in the night. In the beginning, they might be clear and easy. But the best way to share them is to express them as laying foundations for the rules: not too many, not too few, but clear for everybody. Once set, everyone must respect them. You must respect them the best. In the same time, it is important to train this skill, because your principles evolve and so do you.

  2. Express gratitude. Train yourself to use any anniversary, any opportunity in order to thank people which have made a contribution. Thank your clients after buying from you. Thank your collaborators for doing a good work. Thank your employees for reaching the goals. Thank your partners for supporting you. If you believe in God, keep this in mind: do not wish for God to give you how much you can take! You can take and have as much as you want as a burden in this life. Whatever you want, God can give you. But, in order to keep it, you must remember to be satisfied with less and with more, to take any success as a gift from God and not as a merit. The gratitude is a key skill for an entrepreneur.

  3. Recognize the teachable people. There are no real incompetents, only people who don’t manifest or have lost the capacity to learn. Therefore, choose wisely to work with only those people who can be taught. Do not hope that giving chances to seemingly talented people will make them fly and become stars. Most oftenly, the people you like the most are not those which necesarrily perform the best. Welcome the people who you choose to improve their careeer working with you!

  4. Train yourself to make distinctions between options, possibilities, opportunities and probabilities. All might sound similar, but they are very different. Anything is possible until you have to chose options. Those options must be at least probable. Between the options which are probable, you have to prioritize your opportunities and decide wether you want to choose them or create them. But remember, whatever you do, your options must not only be possible, but probable also! Many young professionals start their entrepreneurship career doing business plans like they did during faculty, but fail miserably. Know your territory and act upon that knowledge!

  5. Constantly develop yourself. What happens when the one thing that you are able to do for your clients is the thing that stops you the most from developing yourself? The competition will likely take over in a matter of time. You need to constantly be a source for re-invention. Working for your own development should not be in a competition with working for your customers or with your employees. Time for yourself to develop is also needed in order to enhance your business.

  6. How much do you allow yourself and others to act authentic in a relationship? Find and recognize the other people’s values, beliefs and convictions. Beliefs are convictions we believe to be true. Attitudes are collections of beliefs and values around a certain topic. There isn’t such a things as a “non-value” or “anti-value”, there are only different beliefs, values and attitudes. Erach person is motivated by different scopes and if you learn to discover those asking specific questions (such as some from LAB profile), it is worth to use them and to link them with each of the important actions that need to be taken for your business plans to work. Values lead to motivation. Motivation leads to vision. Vision leads to strategy. Why? Because where there’s a will, there’s a way. If the strategy does not take into consideration the values of the employees, it will be a difficult to implement strategy.

  7. Use the faults of the employees in the favor of the teams. Knowing that a certain person has a low performance in a certain area means that you know not to delegate to that person something (s)he might do which is wrong. Creating teams taking into consideration both their strong points and their weak points is a service that you can do creating the kind of complementarity that the collaborators could and should appreciate.

  8. Constantly shape in your mind the model of the best entrepreneur that you can be. How does that feel? What does this model do? How do you see him or her? Remember, it’s a model, it’s not Superman, it doesn’t have to be perfect. Practice in your mind what you would do in different types of situations: with your employees, with the clients, with the partners. Put yourself in the shoes of people who need to make difficult decisions. What’s worth doing to become such an entrepreneur? What is it important to giv up in order to become this model?

  9. How do you manage to diplomatically tell the truth and be convincing without lying? Practice rethorics and argumentation. What’s worth doing in oder to prove that you are right? Sometimes, it’s not enough top be right. It also depends how you say it. Having different reframing strategies in order to make each person think in his/her way is required, because not everybody will be convinced by the same arguments. In business, it doesn’t matter so much who is right, it matters what makes things profitable. Also, please keep in mynd, what others perceive as a message matters, not what we intend to transmit.

  10. Serve your clients, for their own good, don’t please them. Politicians, coaches and psychologists may oftenly be “punished” for actually serving those who chose them. Pleasing the clients is something which others can do very easily, but it takes some courage to educate your clients to recognize their own deep needs and to be glad they are actually served by what you are offering.

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Schema Dynamics Programming with Stefan Alexandrescu

Posted by Ştefan Alexandrescu on 25/12/2016


Psychologists have worked for more than 100 years in order to find explanations for how the human mind and personality works, to heal the problems hidden deep inside of us. Personal development fields such as neuro-linguistic programming and transactional analysis have come up with effective and efficient solutions for breakthrough to success. Clinical psychology and development of excellence have been long time separated. Now there is a possibility to unite the best of both world: heal the suffering mind and personality and drive it to success and performance.

Questions for you

  • How would it be for you to find out what holds you back to access your full potential and succeed?

  • How can you confront, heal and solve your traumas?

  • Do you want to find the deep psychological and emotional roots of your problems?

  • Are you ready to confront a profound truth about who you are and and how to get yourself out of your way?

  • Have you implemented powerful changes using fields such as psychotherapy, coaching, personal development consulting but only up to one point?

If your answer to any of these questions is “YES”, then this will interest you.

Please read the following lines, as the world they open up might amazingly transform your life!

A revolutionary approach

My name is Ștefan Alexandrescu and I worked one on one with hundreds of customers since 2004. I have always been interested in finding out why some of the people who came to me for various problems or goals succeeded after just 2-3 sessions and some needed tens of sessions. Now I found out and everything else I knew fitted in like a puzzle.

The key I was missing was offered to my by schema therapy, but I found something even better. Using advanced techniques that I tested and developed in working with clients, I have found out what some might call ”the Holy Grail” of psychology and personal development. I have developed an integrative approach using schema therapy conceptualization and homework, Spiral Dynamics theory, NLP techniques and various correlations with other psychological theories that is unique.

Answers for you

I have so far worked with 6 customers in 2016 and after tens of individual sessions I have come to some amazing results.

  • Do you also want to know and deeply understand how your personality works inside out?

  • Do you also wish to unveil the deepest roots of all your sidetracks that cover your potential?

  • Do you want to set your path straight to a powerful future that will fulfill your goals and talents?

  • Do you also want to embark on a journey confronting all the fears, limiting beliefs, uncovered traumas and inner conflicts in order to break through of them?

  • Do you want to find out what has been keeping you from becoming who you were meant to be?

If your answer to any of these questions is “yes”, then please keep reading, because I am going to present you how and what.

The questionnaires

The first thing you need to do is to complete several tests (psychometric questionnaires), totaling a few hundreds of questions. These will require a lot of concentration and a state of introspection. Based on your answers at those questions, you will have to send me the results and I will calculate your scores, make a few correlations and offer you a free evaluation.

When we meet, either face to face or through Skype, the evaluation must be done with the results open (all the Excel and PDF files), so that you have a full understanding of how the model of interpretation works for you.

The tests I will give you will have identified a detailed list of:

  • your strong points, in skills, talents and personality traits

  • your main weak points, that hold you down from reaching higher goals

  • how these are correlated with your experience and manifestations

These tests work within the correlations between various theories from NLP, transactional analysis, Spiral Dynamics, schema therapy and classical psychology.

The tests can be done for free in a variety of forms. The first consulting session of brief, general interpretation of these profiles is provided fully free of charge, with no strings attached. If you decide that you want to start a journey of deep transformation, a program tailored specifically for your needs awaits you. The program is designed to be flexible and very efficient. It will require time, money and effort, but I promise you it will be one of the best investments you have ever done in your life if you choose to go through it.

You have now the chance to be part of the second wave of clients using this integrated approach between personal development for excellence and clinical psychology. This has already provided amazing results for clients in just a matter of months! Please inquire further if you want to know more about the consulting activity of Stefan Alexandrescu in 2016.

This isn’t for you if:

  • you cannot allocate at least 2 hour/week or 1 hour/week for the consulting session and at least 3-4 times more for homework (journals, letters, goal formulations, lists, questionnaires)

  • you think 50 euros/hour for a program that can change your life in a few months is too much

  • you are afraid to confront yourself, discover yourself in depth

  • you don’t care about what happens to you in the future

  • it’s OK to postpone your goals, happiness, fulfillment or healing time and again

  • you don’t have the discipline to invest the efforts into your development

with the likely results that:

  • you will try to fix surface issues (effects) which will appear in your life in various ways, with little chance to approach the deep roots

  • you will try to fix behaviors (effects) in stead of beliefs, emotions and experiences (causes)

  • the problems will cost you more than solving them

  • feel this sounds great, but you don’t have a few hours to complete the questionnaires

This is a difficult and challenging process. Not everyone is up for it. Are you ready? I can promise you this:

  • you will unveil painful memories

  • you will understand the mechanisms of faulty behaviors that endanger your life as you know it

  • you will experience intense negative emotions

  • you will feel disappointed towards people in your life

  • you might try to find excuses to interrupt the process

with the likely effect that in the end:

  • you will have deep insights

  • you will be able to choose in the present what is appropriate for you

  • you will understand and accept yourself and others

  • you will experience the power of forgiveness

  • you will train the skills you need to perform

  • you will become a better parent

  • you will be able to heal deep wounds in the past that restrain you from being yourself.

Start now!

The first steps are to get in touch with me, receive the questionnaires, complete them, let me score them and receive your free evaluation!

Find out more! Get in touch NOW! This is for you!

Ștefan Alexandrescu

0040 729 034 883

stefan [dot] alexandrescu [at] yahoo ]dot] com

Copyright © Ștefan Alexandrescu, 2016

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13 Hints – How to Separate Value from Mind Bugging In Webinars

Posted by Ştefan Alexandrescu on 26/11/2016

In the past years, putting together the increase of internet bandwidth supporting high definition instant live video streaming, the increasing capacities of server streaming for thousands of people, together with the price falling for hardware technology, internet access (even on mobile devices) and data centers services, more and more learning companies develop business models centered on webinars in multiple formats which promise to deliver some free information to the watchers/listeners and some sort of attractive special offer.

In my experience, such webinars can be somewhere between money-making & life changing to an utter waste of time listening to some charlatan’s bogus.

There are certain programs which facilitate access to various learning workshops providing practical blueprints with videos, audios, workbooks, transcripts, forms, procedures, tables and so on.


Of course, many people might be convinced to spend some time with these stuff, but I’m going to give you some suggestions about how to not lose too much time with this stuff while also getting most out of such opportunities. What you might not know about most of these:

  1. Most webinars are promised to last a certain amount of time. They usually last double, but if you stay till the end, you may find the real offer with special discount.
  2. Very many of the programs offered for hundreds of dollars can be found on the same website with a special significant discount, such just a few tens of dollars or even just 1 $. Of course, if you don’t know how to look for it or don’t at least try to close the page and see if you are tempted in that moment with a lower offer, you get taxed more. For example, I participated in a webinar where they were selling a course for 279$ and I found it at 1 $ while browsing on the web for it during the webinar. Another program was being offered at 999 $ and was later offered for 50 $ after a month for those who didn’t buy it initially.
  3. Some of what you learn can really make you a lot of money and change your life, IF you apply those things. But, basically, when you subscribe to a webinar you find out that there’s about 80% promotion and 20 % content because a webinar is essentially a 2-3 hour-commercial
  4. If you subscribed for the webinar and bothered appearing just for 5 minutes, most trainers will send you the replay to watch/listen whenever you want to, like for example on your dumbphone. This is a very good and practical idea especially if you are not convinced you want to buy whatever that person is selling you. In the same time, it must be said that by doing so, you are guaranteed to miss the time-limited offer at the end of the webinar.
  5. Theoretically, you have the opportunity to ask some questions during the live webinar, but there are chances that from thousands of people attending and hundreds asking questions, yours wouldn’t be answered unless they are very good and posted multiple times or by different people.
  6. Many of them have nothing to do with the advertised subject, they are just a bunch of shitty hocus-pocus new age mindbabble since the time of “The Secret”. I though people grew up and overcame that fashion, but apparently there are still thousands of suckers hoarding in thinking that through visualization they are going to mind-bend the universe.
  7. The most practical things I found are the entrepreneurship, marketing and social media oriented contents which practically show you how to organize business around consulting and training. I suggest you take some of those things, apply them and share them with your customers.
  8. When the topic is not oriented on something concrete about business or sales, there are some things to be taken from the amount of psychobabble, but it must be clearly discerned and that takes very much time. So be prepared to take some notes and not get bored with the rest of the content which might be confusing or useless. Watching/listening to a webinar DOES require some present and active knowledge about the topic, otherwise you might just believe everything the presenter is telling, which in most cases can be very dangerous.
  9. All the payments must also be done through PayPal or ClickBank. If the page you are directed to only obligates you to buy with your card, something might be wrong. Before deciding to buy, check the name of the program being advertised together with “scam”, “fraud” or “hoax” together. See what you find. Some of these stuff are just pyramidal schemes, working on the principle: step 1. give something small and valuable step 2. make people think there is more 3. repeat steps 1 &2 indefinitely until the buyers run out of money.
  10. If you are smart and know a little bit more about the subject, you can implement some valuable ideas without buying the whole program. Or you could use the presentation as a model and learn from the selling skills of the presenter and use them in your own experience.
  11. Whatever the topic of interest is, you may find free recorded and valuable webinars on . Also, look for similar topics in MOOCs (Massive Open Online Courses). You might get a similar or better content for free. Find some MOOCs appropriate for you searching on customized keywords here:
  12. The most serious and well-planned online trainings do offer the access to a closed community, usually on Facebook, where you can interact with other participants and with trainers, ask questions and create business opportunities. I think this is one of the most important features, if you have time to access it.
  13. Find out if there is a return policy. Usually, there is something like if you don’t like what you find, you get a full or a partial refund in 7 or 10 days, so hurry up and check if you like what you found. If not, get your money back! Usually, the process takes a few days, so don’t last until the last days, because even if you send the request within time, if it’s not process you might lose the money you want to get back. Some companies retain something like 10-15 % for comission processing or stuff like that, some reimburse you the full payment. Also, don’t use this loophole to abuse the system! If the content is truly helpful, respect the work and pay the money.

Stefan Alexandrescu

consultant in personal and professional development

0040 729 034 883

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How to Live a Perfect Life, Last Part. Steps 9-12 Out of 12, In the Right Order

Posted by Ştefan Alexandrescu on 21/11/2016


Part I

Part II

Part III


9. Set rewarding excellence goals and become the best in your business

It seems that there have been many steps until here, but all your efforts will be completely rewarded. Definitely, you can only become the best in your job, organization, niche or business if you have managed to confront the typical problems swifter and effective, if you have delivered on the goals you have trained with until now and have acquired top skills that put you in front of the game of others.

I’m referring to vision and strategy: working smart for the right reasons can help you identify the 20% that bring the 80%. Now, your goals have to be daring, bold to make you control the autonomy and true independence that will make a dent and leave your name in the history. Only after you have tested and followed the whole system inside out, you can replicate it for profit at a higher scale. Take into account all the lessons, all the motivations, take a calculated risk and “shoot for the moon”! Do it again and again, be the best and work smart to stay there! You truly deserve to celebrate especially when you bring this achievement to reality after pragmatically testing options for success. Failing to do this earlier might sidetrack your efforts, take longer or bring stepbacks you can’t face on your own. Coaching is a must at this level. Modeling and mentoring also definitely works. Also, niche-specific training and skills-related training can benefit you for what you need/want here.

At this level of excellence, you also have to improve the skill of seeking, connecting and networking within groups of professionals sharing similar preoccupations, abilities and personality preferences, in order to continue to grow, learn and excel through the power of communities (see more further).


10. Find people who share your vision and values

Very likely, until this point of excellence, you’ve worked within teams, or in proximity or in collaboration with other people in your life experience. At a certain point, you decide to let go of unfulfilled expectations, go with the flow and get social, not only for business networking, but as well for deeper human connection.

Of course, it’s not about connecting with people who have been put there by someone else or by random design (like in school or in a company where you were hired). It’s about connecting with people you can actually test and recognize as having approximately similar values, visions and experiences.

After each of you have had your successful experiences, you can get together to share your wisdom, learn one from the other and create a win-win-win community. Trying to do so earlier implies the risks of having your good intentions work for somebody else’s individual limited benefit, or mistaking you illusions/expectations for reality, or mistaking a functioning system for a community.

You can prepare for this step by joining and working with/for people who have a track record of creating both individual success based on strategy and team success bases on collaboration. Volunteering for a cause you cherish can also be helpful in opening up new horizons of harmony in the human experience. Just find some people who are already doing or thinking what you like and give them a hand! Other ideas: personal development thematic groups, periodical skills-based training within a community.

In order to fully enjoy this level of development, it is necessary to develop close personal and professional relationships with others. In these instances, it must be OK to share warmth, caring, attention, empathy, protection (strength, guidance, direction), disclosure and listening. Why? For the purpose of creating a harmonic team that works for everyone, which can bring consensual guiding for each interested, for long term. This is what deep social interaction can mean when people live and act for the causes they share.


11. Learn more outside of your area of expertise

Hopefully, there come a time when, after years and years, you can not only be the best in your niche, but you can do it quite effortlessly, even in your sleep. This is the moment to continue developing your other talents. Learn something new. Get deeper knowledge of your field. Get a new hobby. Enjoy a healthy life. If you feel bored or that it’s time for a big change, consider developing skills for a different field you might be talented in.

This time, integrate all the resources (time, money, people you know, all that you studied) to make the most out of the new learning. In the beginning, it may be a little hard to get used to make more effort to succeed at something (because everything is so easy when you’re an expert), but the more you learned, the easiest it is to learn more, because of the many synapses that are already there and in function.

This step should allow you to find more peace within yourself, without control in the group or of the resources. You may reinvent yourself and succeed in ways you wouldn’t have dreamed of being possible. This can be a great period if associated with having children and becoming a parent, or a grandparent. You can only truly live at this level if you have made profit out of your strategy, you have developed functioning networks of authentic communication with peers and are able to see the bigger picture.

The few experts who can work at this level have the ability to work intuitively with large chunks of information to find patterns, may they be in vocational, professional, personal or recreational areas.

If you decide to succeed in a second or third field later in life, after having success in just one or two professional fields, it will be faster for you. The learning must be tailored to your needs. Please feel free to use consulting, coaching, mentoring, modeling and especially training. If you have truly reached this level, you already know how important that is and how to use such services.


12. Redefine the purpose of your life as having a higher meaning

At some moment, each of us searches and sometimes finds the meaning of life. There are plenty of answers, but usually people find a religious meaning, which is connected with having an impact beyond the material world.

Of course, at several points in your existence, the meaning of life can be defined as chasing or living your dreams, to seek happiness, to discover and better oneself, becoming the best achievable self. Seeking the wisdom, you will probably redefine the levels at which you can make a contribution, both personally and professionally. But, at a very special moment, preferably before you die, you may allow yourself to truly let go of roles, duties and social expectations.

This is how you can tend to touch perfection through living, only to become aware of how little you know. That’s why your contribution has to stay with the others after you die. A life worth living is a life that you would find hard to leave from or give up. The true inner benefit of others, making the difference through what you do, say and inspire, is what starts guiding your intentions.

You know you can do better and you are grateful for the chance to act justly and wise, love and give unconditionally. Reaching this, you have found the beauty and the sorrow in your life: you have now started to get the hugeness of the human spirit, the bearing on your deeds and the shortness of life. It’s worth talking about this with a priest. I have personally found the meaning of life in Orthodox Christianity. I have the rest of my life to live it by rediscovering it in my existence, though applying what I have found.


Some final thoughts

I haven’t done all of these steps in this order, but at least now I found the tools that can connect them logically, structurally and scientifically. There is a moment in some lives when everything comes to a circle. You get the final piece of the puzzle, although I’m afraid most people don’t really live this sensation.

Now I am ready for rebooting my journey, faster and together with those who want to experience what I’ve written about here. Often times, when we are confronted with a problem, we don’t quite know what’s the map of that problem, what are its roots and especially, what might be the solutions. Although I don’t have solutions in consulting, theories in learning and questions in coaching for all the possible problems, it’s very likely I know where you are and how to support you to get not only where you want to go, but where you need to go. Blow away your inner obstacles and become who you were meant to be!

I am doing this because I am here to serve you, not to please you. Now you know the truth. Act on it! Change your life now! Follow the steps I have set for you in this article and become part of my life journey! Let’s put some wind in your sails!


PS: Thanks to Corina Andreea Popa for the practical suggestions and feed-back on this article before publishing.

Ștefan Alexandrescu

professional development consultant, trainer and coach

0040 729 034 883

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Leisure and Other Expenses for a Young Professional Living in Bucharest

Posted by Ştefan Alexandrescu on 07/02/2014

This is the last part of the articles I have started to write past month on how much does it cost for a young professional to live in Bucharest.

Here you can read the introduction and summary. Then, I wrote this article on how much are just the basic surviving expenses. The third article was about what are the expenses for administrative necessities.   Now, it is time to take  a look on the third category of expenses – leisure and other expenses.

So let’s get some more ideas about how much does it cost to live in Bucharest:


Books are pretty cheap in Romania, compared to other EU countries, but most of them are in Romanian. A regular price for a Romanian book is about 4-8 €. The books in foreign languages are usually 10-15 €. If you want to buy really cheap books, I recommend you to go the sellers from Universitate, they are opened in the working sunny days between 7 AM-5 PM.

Also, depending on your interest as a professional, there are lots of local and international magazines. Regularly, a niche review can cost between 1.1-6 €. Also, you might be interested in the different business annuals, which are usually published between October-February. Such an annual might have lists of business people, companies and industries, including telephones and e-mails which are hard to find in other places. One such annual might cost between 5-10 € and can be found at most newspaper kiosks, but especially in select stores such as the Relay or InMedio networks, which distribute the best periodicals.


In Romania, all movies are presented in their original language and with Romanian (or, occasionally, English) subtitles. The only dubbed features are some of the animated trash for really small children and they usually come also in subtitled version for adults.

Bucharest has about 70 cinema screens. The number of films in a regular week (Friday to Thursday) usually varies between 50 to 120.

Bucharest has become in the past years quite an important place on the map of small film festivals. There are at least a dozen of them each year, with very low prices for general entry. In Bucharest, there are frequently a lot of films (both commercial, and artistic) which appear in the same time or even before they get launched in the United States.

The price of a regular entry for an adult depends on:

– cinema;

– time of the day/week – there are discounts for morning, weekdays and some spacial day-based discounts on most cinemas;

– if you are a student and/or you have an ISIC/ITIC card, then you usually have between 30-50% discount;

The cheapest tickets are at some of the state cinemas (Gloria, Europa, Studio, Noul Cinematograf al Regizorului Român or NCRR – something like 1.1-1.7 €/entry) and even in some multiplexes (Lights Cinema, Cityplex – something like 2-2.5 €/entry) or private cinemas (Union, Elvira Popescu – 2.2 €/entry). These cinemas usually have a good art films offer. And of course, there are the very high-quality and premium theaters, appropriate for seeing blockbusters, the best of them (and most expensive) being the RomTelecom IMAX theatre, which is located in the Cinema City of the AFI Cotroceni Palace shopping centre near the Politehnica metro, and also two other private cinema screens also in Cinema City which can run 3D + 48 frames per second features. The prices for such an experience is usually between 6-15 €/entry.

There are also a lot of cultural centers (especially British Council and Centre Culturel Francais) which let you borrow books, magazines and films and often have accessible encounters or projections on cultural topics.


Bucharest is the most cultural city in Romania and an important EU cultural city. Usually, all theater plays are in Romanian. The cost of a ticket varies between 2-3 €/entry for a small theater and 5-15 €/entry for a big theater. In some cases, you can also buy a seasonal subscription, if you go often to the same theater. You can also get significant discounts as a student, which may vary depending on the spectacle and the theater.

Business networking events

Usually, there are a lot of business networking events quite accessible for all the English and Romanian speaking young people interested to participate, if you want to meet people, get clients or suppliers. For example, the meetings organized by Junior Chambers International, Business Network International, InterNations. I also recommend Speaker’s Arena for public speakers, Open Connect for entrepreneurs and Noble Manhatttan Coaching Support Group for personal development. Usually, there is a small fee for every single participation to such an event, or a monthly annual fee to be payed. If you go to 2-3 of these each month, the monthly cost would be something like 10-15 €.

Going out

Of course, you will need to allot some money for getting out with people, either on business or on personal reasons. Usually, in the regular bars/coffee houses/tea-houses/small restaurants a coffee/soda/small cake is 2-3 €. Most places have wireless access, but you need to ask for the password from the bar/service desk. There are also some cafeteria or small restaurants (especially near the student centers) where you can eat pretty cheap, healthy and consistent for a decent 3-4 €/meal, but those places aren’t appropriate for business meetings with (potential) customers, .

Some of the most popular meeting places in the center of Bucharest are the historical city center (with hundreds of small terraces and coffee shops), Mac Unirii (or any of the other MacDonald’s in the center), Cafepedia, SpringTime, KFC and the Librarium teahouse from Romană. All these are also appropriate for business meetings, but the quality of food is usually lower and the prices higher. There is also a Starbucks place in the shopping center Plaza Romania. I usually meet with people at Mac Unirii, Spring Time Universitate or KFC Romana.

Depending on how much, how often, who and where you meet in the city, you can expect to pay at least 10 €/m. Usually, I pay about 15-20 €/m.


Please read here my article on this topic. Generally, the monthly budget for gifts would be 5-10 €/m.

Other special expenses

If anything breaks in the apartment, if you get a fine, if you get seriously sick and generally anything you aren’t insured for, can cost you a lot and are not considered in the monthly budget. Also, if you buy a new phone, a new bike, a washing machine, fridge, furniture and anything like that, these are also not considered in the monthly budget. But at least one of these things is likely to be happening in Romania and you should consider a budget of minimum 100-150 €/year, which adds to 8-12 €/m.

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The Testimonial, Set in Stone as the Referent Gave It?

Posted by Ştefan Alexandrescu on 12/12/2012

You have found out what a testimonial is and what benefits it brings to the personal brand. After that, we have discovered together from whom to request it and how. But, just as you should not count your chickens before they are hatched, you do not always get what you wish the way you requested it! What do you do then?

When to modify a testimonial

The moment a referent offers a testimonial, the ideas and words used belong to him/her. The marketer has the obligation to assume these just as they are offered by the referent, but in certain situations, can change:

  • orthographic, writing or punctuation mistakes

  • words that are repeated can be substituted

  • phrases that are too long can be divided into sentences

  • 2-3 words that could be replaced with better synonyms can be replaced

  • if it is needed, he/she can delete certain portions/ideas, if they do not affect the contextual meaning

Look below for an example of a modified testimonial. This testimonial, was originally received in the Romanian language (here translated to English) after that it was translated so that it would be usable at an international level. As you will observe, some meanings were lost in the translation and some corrections were needed. The first is the original. The second is the modifyed one.

Informaţiile obţinute prin aplicarea chestionarului Identity Compass® sunt deosebit de relevante şi pot fi folosite atât la nivel personal, cât şi în organizaţie la partea de evaluare la angajare/promovare şi la stabilirea unui plan pentru dezvoltarea individuală. Poate furniza managerilor date despre profilul motivaţional al subordonaţilor şi poate ajuta în contruirea echipelor performante.

Este un instrument uşor de folosit şi sunt convinsă că va avea o mare dezvoltare în domeniul organizaţional.

Mara Manea,

Training Specialist

Coca-Cola HBC Romania


« The information obtained by the Identity Compass®  questionnaire application are especially relevant and can be used at the personal level but in the organization, too (at the evaluation part of employment/promotion and for establishing an individual development plan). It can provide to managers data about the motivational profile of subordonates and can help to build performant teams.

It is an instrument easy to use and I am sure that it will have a great development in the organizational field. »

Mara Manea
Training specialist
Coca-Cola HBC Romania

 The information obtained by the Identity Compass®  IS especially relevant and can be used at the personal level AND in the organization too (TO EVALUATE FOR employment/promotion and for establishing an individual development plan). It can provide to managers data about the motivational profile of EMPLOYEES and can help to build HIGH PERFORMANCE teams. It is an instrument THAT IS easy to use and I am sure that it will have a great IMPACT in the FIELD OF ORGANIZATIONAL DEVELOPMENT. »

Mara Manea
Training specialist
Coca-Cola HBC Romania

This testimonial, after it was received, was contained just as it was offered, in a list with other, similar references and the referent received access to the document, having the right to oppose if it did not agree with the context it appeared. The testimonial refers to the product of a company which activates in over 40 countries and was translated, so that it would be able to be used for promotion at an international level. 2 persons with ability of decision in the respective company requested the modifications pinpointed above and it was needed to inquire the referent’s permission in order for the testimonial to be able to be published in its new form, even though you can observe it is not a big difference.

I have used this example, because in this case, the referent, inasmuch as the one who operated the testimonial are top experts in the domain they are active and have experience regarding the promotion of services. As a proof, you have observed how, sensitive to the loss of some meanings by translation, the recommended company’s representative insisted to adjust the testimonial, and did so with respect for each word the person had written. I know an example of one person that was to be sued because it sent, neglectfully, to some people, a version of a promotional document in which there was a version with 1-2 words that had not been modified in time at the referent’s request. Testimonials represent a thin line and matter for litigation. Example given, this article contains certain…examples. But these examples are used from testimonials for which the referents have given their acceptance for being used in public and the copyright law stipulates that any examples may be used for educational/demonstration purposes as is the case with this article, without requesting the referent’s permission deliberately, however these situations are pretty restricted. My recommendation is you request permission for everything and always to offer transparency to your referents.

<<Never mind, write there whatever you want and I will sign!>>

This is one of the phrases which many potential referents will tackle you with, alleging lack of time, inability, etc…

First, it is a deontological criteria, that obligates every initiator to use only real references, leading all the way to publishing the referent’s contact information even in the promotional material, in order to be able to verify (most frequently, in the online surroundings, link on the name to the e-mail address is practiced).

Second, another criteria exists, even more practical: if you write about what you would like others to read and you do it in a constant manner (in case you falsify the testimonials), you will notice at one moment that all the testimonies that you have signed by referents have almost the same style. I will give you an example about how much different the attitude, personality and style can be reflected of three persons who offer testimonials for the same service, of graphological analysis.

My personality was “read”, pretty much, by means of the graphological analysis and a part of the aspects found clarified some doubts regarding the choice of my future profession. In other words, the made description confirmed what I knew about be, on one hand, and on the other hand, made me discover other aspects which I did not know about and that are useful for creating a solid road.

In order to realize the best choices in life, first you must know yourself very well. I think the graphological analysis is a useful method regarding this and you do not have anything to lose by trying out this option. You might be surprised in a pleasant sense, just as I was, rediscovering myself in a large part of this graphological analysis and not only that, but even discovering things that I did not know about my personality”.

Madalena Tenchiu

Copy editor, Iasi

There are pseudo-psychological tests online. Anyone can take them and think they are correct. The truth is that nothing compares with the prepared individual who explains face-to-face how the things are. I liked the analysis. Besides the fact it was amusing, it was also useful for me. Useful and pleasant, the most beautiful of all combinations”.

Ioana Stefania Ciureanu,

Graduated Medicine and Pharmacy, Iasi

Even though I tried to dissimulate certain things on my page, Ştefan Alexandrescu, in the position of graphological analyst, made an exact analysis of my personality”.

Luana Stanciu,

Commercial law counsellor, Bucharest

It is obvious these three testimonials were written by different persons. And they represent, additionally, a warranty of the fact that persons from different domains (in this case, editorial, academic, economic-law) will have a positive view concerning the offered service, despite the difference of perspectives, style and field of activity. Likewise, we remember easier what we wrote/said than what anyone else wrote/said. The moment it will be contacted, a referent will know what he/she wrote you, as a reference, comparing to the situation where you composed a nice text and he/she only signed it.

Sometimes, it happens that you discover, with this occasion, that a person is not fully satisfied with your service and this will give you some suggestions of improvement. At one moment, together with a group of students from the department of psychology I tried a method of team-building. Even though it was not done until the end, due to limits of time and space, I had the impression it had gone well and thought it would be a good idea to request some references for the respective method, but with this occasion I discovered that things did not necessarily go bad, but they did not go as good as I would have liked to think. Two participants made some observations that helped me understand where I had done wrong. If I would not have requested these references, I would not have gotten a feed-back, even though I had requested feed-back immediately after the session of team-building. Which proves that…

A feed-back is not a reference,

and a reference is not a feed-back

The moment you receive a positive reference, warm, from the heart, from someone who you know was really helped by your product/service, it is the case to congratulate yourself. These are the most precious testimonials, even though it might happen for them not be observed by others, but they are the ones you will remember. Example given, in my work of profiling in the field of human resources, it happens sometimes for certain clients to have insights or revelations about themselves, a thing that can help them develop; even though the purpose of profiling is for example choosing a job or evaluation for a certain post, a side benefit might be that of the person being able to identify more clearly certain problems or directions for action by means of which to make a decision. Just as the case of Andreea was:

I have to admit that I have always needed help in identifying firstly my problems, or better said, their essence. I have always known I am also my biggest enemy. I have never understood why. The profile enlightened me from this perspective. After the profile, I had a sort of a revelation. And this opened my eyes upon the strategies that I should adopt regarding me in the future. I began today…

Stefan found the problem and its explanation in only an hour…for me it took years to understand the decisions I made. If I were to say in per cent the results of the profile in relation to reality, I would say 99%”.

Andreea Serban


Now think well…even though I know what I would like the clients to express about the offered services, do you really think such a testimonial could be counterfeited? And to be of a different style compared to the other 7 testimonials of the same service on a certain type of profile? Small probability. Additionally, if you are good enough to make an effort in forging some references (a thing I consider absolutely embarrassing and irresponsible for someone who works in marketing) and to use styles that are sufficiently different so that you do it successfully, believe me that you have the abilities to offer your services at a level of quality that you will obtain testimonials <<for real>> with much less effort.

Those who will know best how to appreciate your work are others.

Leave the words to them, and these will come to you.

If you will run after wonderful descriptions in the (auto)promotion of your services, these will not come.

I thank you!

Happy Self Branding


Useful references for the content of this article

Shelle Rose Charvet – Words that change minds/Cuvinte care schimbă minţi, Editura Amaltea, 2006

Dan Kennedy – Magnetic Marketing Collection

Andy Szekely – Ghidul credibilităţii, 2007

Jack Trout, Steve Rivkin – Puterea simplităţii

For a full list of articles on personal branding, in Romanian and English, press here.

 Previously published in Romanian [ro, blog] Translated by Răzvan Nidelea

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The Ethics of Public Speaking

Posted by Ştefan Alexandrescu on 15/04/2012

Motto: “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care”


Accountabiliy and responsability

Certainly, if you believe the message of putting on seat belts is a good and safe message to deliver, you will want to be as persuasive as possible. Certainly, comparing each of the three scenarios before, you will have made a difference in degrees of conviction. In the first example, you presented some data and used some influencing language (“naturally”, “more and more interesting”, “before thinking further”, etc.). In the second case, you provided an experience to remember for the participants, in an advertising kind of way. That was persuasion. In the end, you emotionally manipulated the public from the beginning to the end. At the end of the day, you feel good because you think maybe some of what you said and did will have saved some lives.

Of course, one important aspect which didn’t get mentioned in all three presentations is that after more than 80 km / h, the seat belt is no longer a protecting benefit, but a traumatizing instrument. One of the participants to your presentation, let’s call him Michael, drives with 125 km / h, gets in an accident and because he was wearing the seat belt, he ruptures is spine and breaks his ribs. In the first case, Michael might remember he did surrender to the common wisdom of wearing a seat belt. He might remember that someone made a presentation and suggested it might be a good idea. In the second case, Michael will certainly remember the road fantasy ad you made him pass though and he will hate you for giving him incomplete information. In the third case, you can count on the fact that this time, Michael’s wife, Diane, will remember you, because when Michael got home he couldn’t keep from ranting over and over again on the brilliant presentation you made and the important message for all the family. Diane sews you and the company you work for, for more money than you, your sons and your nieces can pay in a lifetime for misleading information resulting in lifelong infirmity for her husband and all the health bills.

The road to hell is paved with good intentions. The intensity of using persuasion about a certain message you want to carry across doesn’t only make you responsible, but also accountable for some of the results your listeners experience.

Often times, in our lives, we are convinced the beliefs we hold are good and healthy, and we hurry to share them in all good faith. But, in time, especially when we really get informed on a certain topic, we can understand how what we once thought does not hold the same value anymore. So keep in mind you solely are responsible, in front of yourself, in front of your listeners, in front of the organizers, in front of the organization you are representing when doing public speaking, and, above all, in front of God. “Always act like your granny is watching you!” 


Message and intention in public speaking

The meaning of communication is to influence. We only communicate to influence others. “The human communication is a process through which an individual (the communicator) transmits stimuli with the purpose of changing other individuals’ behavior (the auditorium). “ (1). Therefore, any public speaking must either influence, or persuade, or manipulate. During the previous century, someone could have conceived as a purpose for a presentation to inform. To offer information. Today, we live in the XXIth century. Nobody cares about information anymore. Information can be found for free on the internet, about almost anything. It’s at everybody’s fingertips. If you want to inform, go back in the stone age and play for a change.

Ethics in this context is simply a matter of how well you know the actual information on the topic you’re presenting and what is your intent. Any person able to manipulate must be aware of the fact that determining change which is improper in the long term in the manipulated person(s) will loose the effect and generate loss of credibility for you. Integrity is a notion that some people started training on: “How to resonate with your message”, “How to be connected with your inner self when delivering the message” and crap like this. It’s simple. If you believe in your message and your intentions, you will be congruent. If you don’t believe, you won’t. Anything less is like painting vulture wings on a chicken and hoping it will fly.

You wanna know why was Edison so determined to invent the light bulb, after he has discovered 1000 ways of not inventing it, after his whole lab burned to the ground? He wrote 9 pages of how would the world be better if he brought his invention to life. I don’t think Edison needed any inner congruence exercises.

There is even a deeper look into this. Let’s say we see someone doing something wrong to themselves, in their life, like victimizing and searching for rescuers. We may explain the whole mechanism and make that person aware of a lesson (s)he needs to learn, but in the same time we deprive them by a lesson they need to learn by themselves. I see this especially in young people, when they start to get an understanding of how psychic processes work, they are tempted to apply it everywhere, sometimes with people who are not prepared to face some of their own truths. It’s one thing to determine someone not to drink alcohol or not to smoke anymore, or to be firm with a friend. And it’s another telling to someone, or an audience, they’re on a wrong path. When we take away someone’s power to learn from their own mistakes, we often position ourselves in the perspective of the know-it-all, although we might have good intentions. It’s simply a similar matter to giving someone fish opposite to teaching them to fish.

I remember a positive experience, when Bogdan Enoiu, the entrepreneur who started McCann Erickson România and one of the wealthiest advertising experts in Romania, at the Business Club Conferences in Spring 2010, Bucharest, asked the students from ASE (Romania’s most prestigious economic university) what professional choices do they have for their future. Some answered “branding”. Others answered “PR”. But they weren’t very convinced. He simply said there aren’t so many open places in branding. And there are no more than 500 jobs in PR, in the whole Romania. He was a diplomat. In an industry where branding agencies strive to live and can barely make, all of them, 1 million euros a year, in an industry where organizations looks for more measurability and less for PR. In the same industry all the advertisers work three times as hard for half the same money as two years ago, these students and who knows how many more, dream of becoming communicators. He could have told them they have no chance, but then everybody would have hated him. In a few years, they will see for themselves. He simply suggested. But for those who understand beyond words and know the market dynamics, he said more than enough. It was a memorable impact presentation through its simplicity.

We usually retain:

  • 10 % of what we read

  • 20 % of what we hear

  • 30 % of what we see

  • 50 % of what we see and hear

  • 70 % of what we talk with others

  • 80 % of what we experience

  • 95 % of what we teach others (2).

We tend to remember more what we said ourselves than what others said. When public speaking, we have the chance to communicate our message to hundreds, thousands, and due to present technology, instantly communicate with millions of persons, that means exercising one of the most difficult tasks possible these days: making our message memorable.


1. Dinu, Mihai – Comunicarea, Ed. Ştiinţifică, Bucureşti, 1997, apud Prutianu, Ştefan, – Tratat de comunicare şi negociere în afaceri, 2007, Polirom, first chapter.

2. William Glassere


Books to read

  • Carnegie, Dale (1934) – The Art of Public Speaking

  • James, Tad (1997) – Presenting Magically

  • Hoff, Ron (1992) – I Can See You Naked, A New Revised edition of the National Bestseller on Making Fearless Presentations, Andrews & McMeel, USA

  • Prutianu, Ştefan – Tratat de comunicare şi negociere în afaceri, Polirom, 2007

  • Cleveland, Kenrick E. – „How to Use the 36 Chinese Stratagems to Win”, Influence Marketing LLC, 1997


Films to see

  • Patch Adams (1998) Directed by Tom Shadyac

  • Julius Caesar (1953) Directed by Joseph L. Mankiezewicz

  • Thank you for Smoking (2004) Directed by Jason Reitman

  • The Network (1976) Directed by Sidney Lumet

  • Kramer vs. Kramer (1977) Directed by Sydney Pollack

  • The Verdict (1982) Directed by Sydney Lumet

  • A Time to Kill (1995) Directed by Joel Schumaher

  • Amy’s Orgasm (1998) Directed by Julie Harris

  • Shakespeare in Love (1998) Directed by John Madden

  • There Will Be Blood (2007) Directed by Paul Thomas Anderson

  • City Hall (1995) Directed by Martin Brest

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To Manipulate Or Not to Manipulate, That Is the Question

Posted by Ştefan Alexandrescu on 06/04/2012

I’m telling you this with hope in my heart and trust that by offering patience to the initiative I’m going to tell you about will create an important and a long-waited change. Before telling you what I’m going to tell you about, thank you for listening me, as I am sure you will consider my message important. As you think of it, with each word, my message becomes clearer to you and you can easily understand what I am saying. Let us find new ways of expressing ourselves… For, example, I…


Overcoming public speaking fright

It is said that the second greatest possible fright, except for the one of dying, is the fright of public speaking. Fortunately for me, I have not met many people which were afraid to speak in public. Maybe during grade school. Public speaking is familiar environment for me.

The best exercise I recommend, out of my own experience, is getting in front of all while saying to yourself: “In 30 seconds, my mouth will start speaking. It would better say something useful.”. So I did. So will you. Another exercise: if someone would have a gun to your head and would tell you: “speak well in public now or I kill you”, how do you think you’d perform? You’d certainly do a better job if you knew your life depends on the quality of your delivery. For some, that IS the case. May they be presenters, trainers, lobbyists, attorneys, diplomats, press releasers, politicians, the quality of their public speaking will determine how much money they will make. But this is not a study of what best public speakers do.

My intention is to familiarize you with the truth that everybody speaks in public. Better, worse. But if you think at it, all of us had to make a public presentation, or to address a public in a one-to-many communication instance. But what are the things to consider before doing public speaking in the HR world in an ethical fashion?

Public speaking is definitely a part of HR persons. Conferences. Board meetings. Employee meetings. Focus-groups. Evaluations. Fairs. Exhibitions. Workshops. Trainings. All these cannot be avoided.


How much of well planning makes for an ethical delivery?

First thing to consider is: “be themselves”. If you address a public, you must know that public. Who’s in it, what degree of information do they have on the topic you’re speaking, what is their interest in the topic, what kind of questions they will put, etc. It’s a sign of respect towards your message, to each of the participants in the public and to the organizers. And also consider these days anyone can video / audio record you with a simple phone or mp 3 player, not to mention the photos. Then, they can be placed on the internet, tagged with your name and accessed by anyone, for the rest of eternity. If you don’t have respect for all of these, you will be remembered. It’s not only the skills that you put to practice, but also your values.

Of course the better job you do on planning your speech, of taking care of the surroundings (light, height, noise, distance, temperature, technology settings, etc.), the better you will show respect for your public. These might seem as the organizers’ responsibility. But if you really care about your personal brand, your message and the public, make it your responsibility to triple-check.

Let’s assume you address a public well educated, well informed and interested in the subject matter you present. The audience has been pre-selected and you’ve put certain questions at the beginning to make sure you’re on the same page. Now you’ve got their attention. You have the formal authority in the room. From this moment, if you skillfully use your persuasiveness, you can imprint any ideas into their minds. You may masterfully conceive your speech so that they would understand and maybe agree to it, at least until a certain point. You may even manipulate them.

Beyond that, it lies the question: what is the line between influencing, persuasion and manipulation? When does it serve well and when does it not?

First of all, none of these have negative meaning by themselves. A mother may manipulate her children by saying: “Do you prefer to drink the [bad tasting] medicine from the white cup or from the blue cup?”, using a double bind to determinate an action. Some would not consider this as manipulation, because, some say, manipulation is always negative. In stead of ranting on the concepts: responsibility; accountability; life lessons; we’ll do some practice.


Let’s come back to the fine distinction between influencing, persuading and manipulating someone. Although there are uncountable ways of doing any of these, let’s just say we want to send the message that using seat belts during driving for all the passengers saves lives. Noble idea, don’t you think? We’ll see.



When you’ll start to think about this, you will naturally find what I’m saying to you as more and more interesting. “Looking at the accidents statistics in USA, in 2004, more persons which did not use a seat belt died in accidents than those who who were wearing / although, according to the federal statistics, more than 80% of the drivers use belts. […] Apparently not wearing the seat belt during driving the car is about the same thing as having a dagger installed on the driving wheel.”. Before thinking further on the way this affects our lives, let us consider all the small differences seeming minor details like putting the seat belt on before driving to actually truly understand the real effect of those seemingly minor details. The difference between using and not using your seat belt might be the difference between life and death.


Close your eyes. [the light gets dimmer] Imagine yourself riding in a top notch car on a freeway. [appropriate music] You feel the wind and all the things around you. You get to an intersection. You slow down, but not in due time and a truck gets into your face from nowhere. You have no time to react. [the lights close] It all went dark. [silence for a few moments]. You just died because you didn’t wear a seat belt [lights open up brightly] Welcome back!


The light gets dimmer. You present a video of a guy named David, with his wife, Molly and their son, Tommy. The are joyful, playing in the garden. Then you show some pictures with them getting in the family car. Then you put on the morgue pictures of David, Molly and Tommy. They didn’t use the seat belt. You rapidly shoot some statistics to the people, in big colorful graphic display. In the end, you take a moment in silence, honoring David, Molly, Tommy and the other thousands of people who lost their lives during X period in the Y zone and say a prayer. 

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Job Publishing

Posted by Ştefan Alexandrescu on 16/02/2012

We hire secretary as assistant manager. The perfect age is 20. The minimum experience requirement is 30 years.

There are two professional categories which might be interested in this articles. The first is, of course, the beneficiaries of the Job Announcement. The other is the Job Publishing Providers.

The purpose of publishing a job announcement is to get a message between the emitter to the receiver. Pretty simple, huh? In theory, yes. But let’s keep in mind the definition.

For the HR specialist

Now, you should have a clear way of communicating right to the target.

Let me put you some questions for you, the HR manager conducting the Advertising for Recruting:

Where is the future employee for your organization spending time? How much time?

What does he read? Where? When? How much?

What are the best methods of getting his or her attention? Keep in mind everyone these days masters the channels through which information is filtered.

What would be the simplest, fastest, easiest path between your message and the future employee?

What are the values of the employee? Use them as key words in your message.

What are the patterns of thinking, behaving, talking which make your future employee observable? Talk his or her language.

What are the most prolific pathways of finding employees in the past?

What are the ways other people in the industry obtain better employees? Find them, use them.

What does the employment message say about you?

What questions does your ad answer?

What is the promise that your ad makes? You have the responsibility towards your future employees and to other candidates to provide a correct image over your company, through the announcement.

What differentiates your message from the competition?

All these seem like very Advertising-oriented questions. Some delusion themselves into thinking HR is all you must know in order to do an HR job. Wrong. But be patient. You can count on the fact that the adversaries who know to create proper messages for future employees will steal the best employees you dream of.

Another aspect you must pay attention to is the development and the creation of your Organization’s Brand as an Employer. Is this vision in accord to the brand of the organization, and its development? Is there a coherent story, beyond the brand?

Keeping in attention this aspect might be the difference between attracting prestige and making a fool of yourself. Beware that even people might not tell you in the face: “You are incompetent”, count on the fact that your mistakes will be remembered, by your employers, by your employees, by your HR fellows and by your competition. Getting employees is one of the most public actions you could do, as an HR specialist.

Communication is the area of expertise for both the HR person and for the advertiser. The difference is the advertiser communicates to large audiences for a living most of the time, as a difference to the HR person, who especially manages internal communication. The HR specialist would certainly be better on consulting with an external communication specialist before publishing anything related to the company’s image, even for those announcements where the company is not specified.

To all this, keep in mind, the promotion provider has no obligation to give you advice on distributing your message towards different channels, it can simply take the message as is and deliver it.

The ad distributor

Weather it may happen through an Advertising Agency, or through an HR Consulting Company, or through a media agency, or a campaign design and executed in-house, the ad distributor has the responsibility of providing a proper message for the customer. Of course, the ad buyer might give an improper ad. If this fails, than it will come again and again, to publish other ads. But in the end, this becomes associated with a bad experience and in a certain moment someone will think of cutting down some costs. This means no more money for an ad provider. To a certain extent, this is a “do to others like you want to be done to you”. Finding new customers for job ads might be as soliciting for an ad distributor as finding good employees for the customers ran by the agencies.

Of course, in a moment of market development, you can count on the fact that request will surpass the offer. But someone who builds a business around a trend is not a real businessman, but an opportunist.

Anyway, it can’t hurt to position yourself as a full service provider, having a few consultants to customize the client’s message. Sometimes, this is reduced to using old templates, like a mercenary and not as a self-respecting services provider. The companies which appreciate efficiency will become attracted by your services if you provide affordable rates of success, rather than coming again and again, out of HR specialists incapability of formulating a targeted message.

In some moments, other organizations’ stupidity might work as an insurance for what you’re doing, but for how long can you have success by counting on other’s stupidity? Wouldn’t it make more sense on differentiating yourself through offering the success creating the best service on the market? 

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